Feeling better 

This week my mood has started to improve a little. Unsure exactly why, maybe the weather, maybe it’s Just me but I am starting to feel a little better about myself and the current situation. 

I spent last month in a pretty dark place. The beginning of April is always sad being my little girls birth and anniversary of her death and she would of been 4 by now. Then finding out my partner had been cheating which literally broke my heart and a few other things that happened almost broke me. 

I decided it’s time to make a few changes and one of them involves weight loss and toning. And before the “you don’t need to lose weight” comments roll in, it’s something I need to do to feel good about myself. Being cheated on leaves you feeling fat, ugly and worthless so I joined a gym. I have been going all week except today (I’m going out later so did not want to over do it). I already feel better, my flabby tummy is going down slowly and with all the exercise and dieting I do at home I have now dropped a dress size to a size 8 which I am pretty happy about. A flat tummy is my ideal goal, after 3 C Sections im left with a flabby small pouch which I hate so I am hoping with a bit more work it will go.

I have also had my nails and brows done too and done my hair roots along with a huge splash out on the credit card on Summer clothes which was a pretty bad idea come to think of it.

My social life seems to be improving too. I’m getting out a whole lot more and increasing my social circles. The more friends the better.

Ryan had his year 6 SATS all this week so I am hoping all the moaning I did leading up to them paid off. My little boy will soon be starting high school and it’s already costing me a bomb with uniform and year 6 school trips.

The job situation is getting me down tho. Constant applications and refusals without so much as an interview and then of course there is 3 lots of childcare to consider. I soy if love, love to have a part time job, not just for the money but to get out and meet people and actually feel like I am part of something but it just seems impossible to get one.

I wouldn’t mind a nice holiday in the sun either just to get away and I would love to beable to drive too. Oh and perhaps a date on top. Don’t want much do I.